Radical Forgiveness
Radical Forgiveness.
My friend Rev. Donna Michael teaches a seminar called Radical Forgiveness. I like the way that name sounds. Forgiveness that goes down so deep it hits the bone.
We've all heard that forgiveness doesn't just affect the person that you are absolving, but it affects even more. It affects YOU!
You are the one holding the negative energy in your soul, in your muscles, in your heart, in your mind. Unforgiveness just doesn't feel good--period!
I think about a young hood I thought I could never forgive. I took TJ in from the street when I lived in NYC. He was homeless and penniless. Everyone told me I was crazy, but I thought it was the right thing to do. But the man robbed me, not once, but twice of almost everything in my apartment. The first time he made it look like someone had broken in. The second time, he just disappeared with what was left, and I never heard from him again.
It's hard to forgive someone like that, especially when, at that time, I wasn't fairing all that well financially. I felt embarrassed and confused, because I thought God had called me to help him.
I held a deep resentment, not only for him, but for God for a long time. Until one day, I saw a friend he used to hang with on the corner. I asked him had he seen TJ. The friend told me TJ had been murdered a few months back.
I believe it was in that moment, I finally understood that holding unforgiveness was a useless and burdensome task. The man was dead and I was wishing for righteous vengeance. Worse yet, I thought, maybe my prayers and his actions brought him to this bitter end.
I decided that the decision I had made to take him in, or any decision I would make in life thereafter, I would hold myself liable for and no one else. So, if there were someone to forgive, it would only be myself.
That being said, sometimes forgiving yourself is even hard to do, but it's an easier task than forgiving someone who you have no idea why or how or what intention caused them to wrong you. You can't get in another person's head. You can't know what they had to survive as a child. You can't hear the voices coercing them to do what they do. You can only see the outcome.
Your part of the play, you can see completely. And no matter how much it hurts or it feels he or she unjustly served you. You can believe with all your heart, that when you forgive deep to the bone and reframe the circumstance so that you can believe that you have learned an important life lesson--You will have grown into a better person. Not just sometimes. But every time.
Our prayer: "Spirit God, Teach me to forgive as Jesus forgave. I don't know what a nail feels like in my hand or in my foot, nor do I want to know. But I do know bitterness and a cold heart from resentment. The detachment from love feels sharp like a knife to the heart. I no longer want to feel this ever. Cleanse me of all resentment and unforgiveness. Help me walk in the path of love and peace, now and forevermore."
My friend Rev. Donna Michael teaches a seminar called Radical Forgiveness. I like the way that name sounds. Forgiveness that goes down so deep it hits the bone.
We've all heard that forgiveness doesn't just affect the person that you are absolving, but it affects even more. It affects YOU!
You are the one holding the negative energy in your soul, in your muscles, in your heart, in your mind. Unforgiveness just doesn't feel good--period!
I think about a young hood I thought I could never forgive. I took TJ in from the street when I lived in NYC. He was homeless and penniless. Everyone told me I was crazy, but I thought it was the right thing to do. But the man robbed me, not once, but twice of almost everything in my apartment. The first time he made it look like someone had broken in. The second time, he just disappeared with what was left, and I never heard from him again.
It's hard to forgive someone like that, especially when, at that time, I wasn't fairing all that well financially. I felt embarrassed and confused, because I thought God had called me to help him.
I held a deep resentment, not only for him, but for God for a long time. Until one day, I saw a friend he used to hang with on the corner. I asked him had he seen TJ. The friend told me TJ had been murdered a few months back.
I believe it was in that moment, I finally understood that holding unforgiveness was a useless and burdensome task. The man was dead and I was wishing for righteous vengeance. Worse yet, I thought, maybe my prayers and his actions brought him to this bitter end.
I decided that the decision I had made to take him in, or any decision I would make in life thereafter, I would hold myself liable for and no one else. So, if there were someone to forgive, it would only be myself.
That being said, sometimes forgiving yourself is even hard to do, but it's an easier task than forgiving someone who you have no idea why or how or what intention caused them to wrong you. You can't get in another person's head. You can't know what they had to survive as a child. You can't hear the voices coercing them to do what they do. You can only see the outcome.
Your part of the play, you can see completely. And no matter how much it hurts or it feels he or she unjustly served you. You can believe with all your heart, that when you forgive deep to the bone and reframe the circumstance so that you can believe that you have learned an important life lesson--You will have grown into a better person. Not just sometimes. But every time.
Our prayer: "Spirit God, Teach me to forgive as Jesus forgave. I don't know what a nail feels like in my hand or in my foot, nor do I want to know. But I do know bitterness and a cold heart from resentment. The detachment from love feels sharp like a knife to the heart. I no longer want to feel this ever. Cleanse me of all resentment and unforgiveness. Help me walk in the path of love and peace, now and forevermore."
Posted by Your Gay Friend's Guide Blog at 2/15/2012 2:40 PM 
Categories: love, relationship, Mental Health Relationships:Life Coach:Hypnotherapy, Voice Lessons, relationships, relationship Advice, Relationship Advice, Psychology for an Authentic Self, sex, Relationship, Sex, advice
Tags: Radical Forgiveness forgiveness resentment unforgiveness
Categories: love, relationship, Mental Health Relationships:Life Coach:Hypnotherapy, Voice Lessons, relationships, relationship Advice, Relationship Advice, Psychology for an Authentic Self, sex, Relationship, Sex, advice
Tags: Radical Forgiveness forgiveness resentment unforgiveness
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