I Waited on the Side Lines for Too Long

I can't tell you how many times I have waited for someone to tell me I was okay or all right. I think of a time when something as simple as a phone call from someone was all I needed to validate that he or she cared or wasn't angry. I waited in silence and slowly the air disbursed from my sails, out of my body, of my mind, until I almost felt faint with despair.

We can't rely on others to keep us healthy and sane--PERIOD. Other people have too many variables in their lives to count on for YOUR sanity. First of all, even if a person is sane and the friend is trustworthy, he or she can have something come up that is life threatening and cause him or her to not be able to return a phone call or a text in a timely manner. We can't expect our friends, family, and even our partners to undergird our self esteem to the point that we don't do it ourselves. Relationship can get tricky that way when play them against our self esteem.

I'm saying here... DON'T GIVE YOUR POWER AWAY, by depending upon others to validate what you feel or if you should feel something like (sorry, thankful, excited, etc.). These feelings must come from a deeper place of self esteem in which you manifest. 

Start with a healthy time of prayer and meditation in the morning and in the evening. Clear away the negative by saying a positive statement such as: "I release and let go of all things that no longer serve my body, my mind, and  my life. I am open and willing for peace to transform my thoughts and actions right now." Then simply make a different choice concerning relying on that friend or partner to validate you.

These thoughts you have been holding on to are caustic and the people you expect to help edify you are equally caustic for you. Don't give anyone the chance to take away your joy. Even a great friend can do that, if you set up expectations for them.

Go into each day with the idea that you can bring just as much love to another as you can to yourself. And when you get stuck, unstick yourself by stepping outside your boundaries and your safe zone. Do something you don't normally do, or even better, sit quietly with God and some beautiful music and watch yourself transform. 

Loving you Big!

Posted by Your Gay Friend's Guide Blog at 1/23/2011 9:14 PM
Categories: love, relationship, Mental Health Relationships, Sex, advice, Psychology for an Authentic Self, Relationship Help from a Gay Male Friend, relationships
Tags: self esteem therapy
 

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