I work with all sorts of different problems as a coach and hypnotist. And with this one specific man, we were dealing with relationship issues. He was having trouble committing. (I sense some worried faces out there. Don’t worry, I won’t call you out…. YET!)

 One balmy week in summer my client told me his mother was in town for a visit, and I gently suggested that she come in with him for his next session.  He didn’t think it was a problem, so we invited her.  Holy mother of God… was I in for a treat!

This particular man had trouble with monogamy. So, he invites his mother into the conversation by asking her in his NY Italian accent, “Ma, did you think that you could be monogamous to Dad when you married him?”

She appeared to be a little reserved, sitting right at the edge of the couch beside him.  She fidgeted her hands.  “We--- ye--- see—hmm-- Ah, no.” Her eyebrows raised.  Honestly, I was pleasantly shocked by her forthright answer.

The son goes on. “Well, Ma, when you married Harry did you think you could be monogamous then?”

She looked at me, then at him. “Mhhh, no!”

“How about Sherwood?” the client  asks, now incredulous.

His mother moved so close to the front of the couch, that I thought she was going to fall off. “Well, honey, maybe.”

Being the good life coach, I smile at his mother without judgment, then quickly focus on my client: “So, tell me, Dick, how does that make you feel?”

Richard is just about to launch into a diatribe about finally understanding why he was never able to be faithful to any of his partners, then looks at his mother and says, “Ma, You don’t know the definition of monogamy, do you?”

She says, “Ah, no.”

The 3rd noble truth to being Monogamous is Understanding what Monogamy is and allowing Spirit to help you define it for your life? Right?  If you don’t understand how to add and subtract, you can’t expect to balance your checkbook.

It’s like the time my mother used Crack filler to make meatballs. They rose like Mrs. Shubert’s yeast rolls.

So, you’ve got to understand the tools of change, before you can expect effective results.